Heinz Doofenshmirtz on Ferb

Doofenshmirtz: Hello, people of the Tri-State Area. I just want to tell you about someone who I have to say I REALLY do not like. I think...I think his name's Ferb or something. ANYWAY that kid looks like a hoodlum or something. And his head. What is...Why....What's up with his HEAD?!? I mean...How do you have a HEAD like that? ANYWAY there's a word we used in my country for guys like him, acting all cool with their backwards caps. We called...We called them HOOLIGANS! And what...Why is he in love with my 16-year-old daughter? I tell ya, he's not getting her. He's not getting my daughter. Nuh-uh. Nope. If he comes near her he better hope I'm not around. Because I'll be waiting. I'll be waiting with my Away-inator. Or maybe a GIANT robot or something.

Norm: Sir, I have your coffee.

Doof: Ah, thank you Norm. (takes coffee and drinks it) Where was I? Oh yeah. I...(phone rings, Doof answers it) Hello? Vanessa? Oh hey, sweetie. What? What do you mean what am I doing? I'm ranting about that F-headed kid I saw you with a couple days ago. Yes, Ferb. What? No, I...I don't HATE him. Okay, bye. (hangs up) I totally hate him.

This has been Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz on Ferb