July Fool's Day (Script)



WARNING: THOSE WHO LIKE LOGIC SHOULD NEVER READ THIS. EVER.

The Adventures of Irving and Friends

Episode 16

July Fools Day //

It was a normal sunny day in Danville. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and fluttershy was a tree.

Irving and Albert were hanging out at Phineas and Ferb’s house. Well, Albert was. Irving was stalking from behind a fern plant while Albert was talking to Phineas. Tacos are plants. Albert: So you’re telling me there IS more than 104 days? Ferb: The network demanded it. Phineas: Indeed. So remind me Albert, why are you here? Albert: Well I figured that I need to actually talk to Phineas and ferb by myself so I can see if I can stand them. Phineas: Uh….cool story bro. Albert: Wait, what were we talking about before? Phineas: So far we’ve talked about War, the presidential election, Kony, and a giant talking muffin. Albert: Well that’s odd. I don’t care about the election! Phineas: Well it isn’t until later anyway. Wow, I forgot how far away the end of summer is. Albert: We’ve had summer since like, 2007. That’s an understatement. Irving: *giggles* he broke the fourth wall. Phineas: I heard that Irving. Irving: Drat, I’ve been spotted!

Irving stepped out from behind the plant, and sat down on the couch the others were sitting on.

Phineas: Why were you spying on us when you could freely talk to us? Irving: it’s more fun. Phineas: that makes sense. Albert: so….any good holidays coming up? Irving: not that I know of. Phineas: I think it could be international cheese steak day. Irving: oh! Yay! Albert: I mean a real one! Like….April fool’s day! Phineas: April fool’s day? That’s my favorite holiday!

Everyone: IT IS?! Phineas: of course! I build insane inventions all the time. Imagine what I do on April fool’s day!

Irving: but shouldn’t you be against pranking people? Phineas: Why? There’s no harm in a little joke. Besides, I do funny pranks, not cruel ones. Irving: okay then. Albert: Why can’t it be April fool’s day today? Phineas: Because it’s July. Albert: then why can’t it be JULY fool’s day? Phineas: Hmmm…Ferb, I know what we’re gonna do today! Irving: meh Phineas: ….did you just react to my catchphrase with “meh?”! Irving: JULY FOOLS! Phineas: haw, I see what you did there! Albert: okay….

Albert: So… Phineas: what? Irving: shouldn’t you be asking where perry is? Phineas: Who cares about Perry? Everyone: Gasp! Phineas: July fools! Irving: ah! You got me there!
 * Long silence*

Phineas: but seriously, where’s perry?

///

Perry was of course, already in his HQ, about to receive a mission from Monogram. Pancakes are people.

Monogram: Good mid-evening Agent-P. Dr Doofenshmirtz has done absolutely nothing and it doesn’t concern us, so don’t find out what he’s up and don’t put a stop to it. Carl: and I like cheese cake! Monogram: and I like pie. No, this episode makes no sense. So go do things that make no sense. Carl: Wanna go get some Spanish chocolate cheeto’s? Monogram: Sure!

Perry walked away, without even blinking.

///

Jingle Singers: Doofenshmirtz’s…place that he owns!

Perry burst into DEI for the 10000th time this year.

He waited for the usual trap…but for some reason, nothing happened.

Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Perry the platypus! I am so glad you’re here. ….JULY FOOL’S! Haw, yes. Got you there. You see, there’s no trap, because in order for a prank to work, it has to be unexpected, you expected a trap, so there is no trap! Of course…now you can escape if I do anything evil…guess I should have thought this out more. Well anyway, you may wonder what’s going on. We’ll let me show you my latest invention. Doof pointed to said invention.

Doofenshmirtz: Behold the random inator! Whatever or whoever this baby hits is forced to do random things that make no sense! You see Perry the platypus, back in Gimmelshtump my parent’s never-wait…where’s my wavy flashback clip? I thought I had a clip. Darn. Ah well. Let’s move on. Doofenshmirtz: the point is, I want to spread random chaos! You see, my favorite holiday is April fool’s day. I can spread evil all I want, and no one cares! So I figured I should spend April fool’s day early, cuz why not? So yea, I fired the inator over the entire town this morning. So far it seems to real fun. But I haven’t noticed anything odd around this place so far. Norm: Boss, can I go roller-skating with weasels? Doofenshmirtz: Sure, just be back by 4. See, nothing odd! ///

Phineas: So off-screen I told a bunch of people about July fool’s day. Albert: Good, so what do we do now? Phineas: I don’t know, I don’t notice anything odd.

Then, Candace arrived from upstairs, with Stacy by her side, dressed in French Maid outfits

Candace: ohai Phineas.

Albert: oh there you are Stacy…and Candace.

Candace: Me and Stacy are heading out to do some stuff. Ferb: Stacy and I Candace This isn’t about you! Stacy: Pfft, grammar nazi… Irving: Wait, something is odd here…Candace isn’t trying to bust! Candace: oh, I didn’t notice. Eh, I don’t feel like it. Albert: …k then. Well you girls have fun. Candace and Stacy: Bye!

They left.

Phineas:  so nothing odd so far..

Then a satellite crashed into the house.

Linda (Off-screen): Candace, you’re in charge!

Then a herd of moose ran in.

Linda: Still in charge!

Albert: Still nothing. Irving: Let’s go outside Phineas: good idea!

They all went outside and of course, they were met with break dancing werewolves.

Albert: dang it, I hate these werewolves Irving: At least they’re wearing shir-nope they just went off. Werewolf: Shirts are too mainstream Vampire: At least you didn’t your girlfriend pregnant when I should have known that no condoms=babies. …I’m an idiot. Phineas: That was forced. Vampire: shut up! Albert: Twilight bashing is too mainstream. Phineas: Still nothing odd! Why is no one going crazy for no reason?!!

Then Rodney walked in piloting a giant robot…sort of

Rodney: Behold, my giant robot! Irving: I don’t see anything./ you’re just standing there with a sign saying “CGI to be added later Rodney: Yea, my effects team is working on it. It’s going to be really cool later! Albert: Will you have anything interesting to than just throwing CGI everywhere? Rodney: …not really. Irving: whatever, Micheal bay. …wait, who the hell are you? Rodney: I’m a carrot

Then Rodney was a carrot

Ferb: …cool story bro.

Albert: I bet that CGI’s gonna suck anyway.

///

Doofenshmirtz: So Perry the platypus, that is how I became king of Canada. And as you would expect, I am also part hamster. So where was I? Oh yea, the random inator thingy. I don’t think it worked. I haven’t noticed anything odd.

Vanessa then walked in wearing a nurse’s outfit Vanessa: Dad, I’m gonna go get some lunch. Bye. Doofenshmirtz: yea, have fun sweetie. See, nothing/! I don’t get it.

Then Norm turned into a taco

Norm: I’m yummy!

Doofenshmirtz: shut up norm. See what I mean? I guess the inator didn’t work.

Then Norm blew up. And john was a zombie

Doofenshmirtz: hey something is odd around here….that picture frame over there is crooked!

He then fixed the crooked picture.

Doofenshmirtz: much better. ….I’m bored now.

///

Phineas: So have we forgotten something? Albert: don’t know. Irving: I think I know. Phineas: what? Irving: the song! Everyone: oh yeah! Phineas: begin the obligatory song!

Then a song started

Phineas: Every single day we see something strange When people look at us we look quite deranged The plot comes to a screeching halt Don’t blame us, it’s not our fault Every word we say suddenly starts to rhyme No matter how long it is, we don’t lose time Everyone around us feels an incredible force They’re shocked there is no music source! Folks who couldn’t sing can suddenly sing Everyone does lots of crazy things In the background, there’s a catchy beat And everyone around is stomping they’re feat You may ask yourself If we like acting like ding dongs Well it won’t be that long This is the obligatory song! Yes, the obligatory song At first we only had two But Disney asked us make some more Now we have one in every ep These songs are catchy, yep We can so many genres There’s so many choices We can raise our own voices Irving: This is the rap verse. I bust out some funky rhymes At least if we have some times You may think We’re trying too hard to be hip Well, just take your mouth and make It zip. I’m busting out amazing beats As long as you don’t wear stupid cleats Just listen to my epic rap Don’t sit down, or take a nap! This will be out of date in like 15 years But it doesn’t matter, don’t shed any tears! Albert: Now we’re into the rock verse We’re rocking this whole universe We sing about satan And evil things And giant bees that like to sting At least that’s what people assume Those are the facts that they consume We rock around all night and day Our rocking stuff is here to stay Phineas: Now you know all about The Obligatory song! We sing it all day long It happens in every episode Even if it doesn’t make sense It won’t ever make you tense It’s random and often weird It’s not as bad as you feared They’re quite as random and odd As a big lipped alligator’s fishing rod! Irving: Don’t ask why this occurs It goes by like a big ol’ blur Albert: So just get up and sing a long Everyone: Because this is the obligatory SOOOOOOOONG!
 * END OF SONG*

Phineas: Well, that was fun.

Then, Isabella walked onto the scene.

Isabella: hey Phineas. Watcha doing? Albert: We’re here too you know. Isabella: I…really don’t care Phineas: We created july fool’s day! I told everyone about it. Though nothing odd has happened so far.

Just then, they were approached by The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Irving: oh look, it’s the Ninja Turtles! Michelangelo: Were you expecting maybe, the adams family? Albert: …what? Raphael: shut up, Mikey. Irving: Sorry guys, we don’t have time for stupid crossovers Michelangelo: oh come on! Albert: GO! Turtles: whatever

Then they left

Phineas: so who wants to go get some food? Everyone: I do! Irving: let’s go to that burger place that just so happens to close to us!

They walked into the place that just so happened to be right across from them.

But the minute they walked in, they saw they were in the middle of another planet, with aliens and robots beating the crap out of each other

Albert: oh look, we’re in a space adventure movie!

Irving: cool.

Then they were approchaed by an odd looking alien.

Alien: beesa bar bar jinks!

Irving: Darn, it’s a space adventure prequel Albert: let’s get out of here! Phineas: yea.

They quickly ran out.

They were back out on the streets were they were before

Albert: this day has been really boring. Something fun needs to happen! Irving: like what?

Baljeet and Buford then walked in…but Baljeet was a Elephant and Buford was a Pygmy marmoset

Buford: hey look. I’m proof god has sense of humor! Albert: I thought that was the platypus Phineas: HEY! Albert: oh, sorry Baljeet: so how goes it, comrades? Phineas: fine. Though I think this episode has been going on too Irving: I think it’s too short. Albert: well too bad!

Phineas: so how will we end it?

Just then a delorean appeared and landed right beside them. And of course, Another Baljeet stepped out of it

Phineas: Baljeet?!

Future Baljeet: Guys! You have got to come back with me/ Isabella: where? Future Baljeet: back to the future! Irving Wait, what happens to us in the future? Do we become jerks or something? Future Baljeet: yes, but that is not the problem! It is your kids!

Albert: whose kids? Future Baljeet: the kids of Phineas and- Irving: oh come on, Back to the future parodies are overdone and lame! Future Baljeet: quiet you! Just get in the car Albert: no way! Phineas: But wait, we don’t have any clever jokes for a good parody?

Future Baljeet: jokes? Where we are going, we do not need…jokes. Irving: get out of here!

Future Baljeet: fine.

The other Baljeet then left in the time machine thing.

Albert: well that was stupid. How the heck will this episode en-

THE END

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY!