The Loveinator

It was a bright, sunny (but rather chilly) day in Danville, and Phineas Flynn was just getting out of bed when his stepbrother Ferb poked him and jabbed his finger at their calendar. "What's the matter?" Phineas asked, taking a closer look at the date. "Oh. It's Valentine's Day!" Ferb nodded, surveying their room. "Hey, where's Perry?"

dooby dooby doo ba, dooby dooby do ba: PERRY!

Perry crawled outside and put his secret agent hat on. Plucking a blade of grass from the ground, he slid silently down an elevator to his lair. "Good to see you, Agent P," said Major Monogram. "The evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz is up to it again. According to our statistics, he's been buying up all the Valentine's Day cards in the Tri-State Area, leaving lovebirds unable to express their love to one another. Get to the bottom of it." Perry saluted and hopped into his hovercraft. Major Monogram turned his head. "Carl! Help me make a homemade card for my wife... and don't spill the glitter this time!"

Phineas and Ferb were sitting slumped against the big tree in their backyard. "What should we do today?" asked Phineas, shivering. "Gee, it's cold." "Well, it is February," said Ferb. Phineas nodded. "Yeah."

dooby dooby doo ba, dooby dooby do ba...

Perry reached Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated and, taking a laser out of his hat, cut a clean, perfect circle in the glass of a window, just big enough for him to fit in. He wriggled through and found Dr. Doofenshmirtz in a fetal position in a purple armchair. A phone was pressed tight to his ear. "Pick up... pick up..." Perry did his signature Perry growl. Or was it a chitter? Either way, it caught Doofenshmirtz's attention. "Oh, hello, Perry the Platypus. My new girlfriend and I are having another rough spot. I just can never seem to keep them! And I don't know why, I mean, I'm so handsome!" Doofenshmirtz got up from the armchair and pulled a lever. A jar fell over Perry, trapping him inside. A large mechanical hand reached down and screwed on a lid. "Don't worry, Perry the Platypus, it has airholes," said Doofenshmirtz indifferently. "Now anyway, since I think my girlfriend is falling out of love with me, I will make her love me again!" He pulled a sheet off a large pink and red invention that looked very much like his Shrinkinator. "Behold... the Loveinator! I decided to dress it up for the holidays." He shivered. "Gee, it's cold. I think I'll go get a sweater. Hold on." He shuffled out of the room, and this was when Perry seized his chance. He took his laser out of his hat again and made an airhole big enough for him to get out. When he extracted himself from the jar, Doofenshmirtz came back in, wearing a fuzzy purple sweater with a neon green D on the front. "Anyway, Perry the Platypus &mdash;" He stopped short, realizing Perry was free. "Perry the Platypus! How did you get free?" Perry showed Doofenshmirtz his laser, and Doof facepalmed. "Oh, the old laser trick, huh? Lucky I have another trap for you!" Doofenshmirtz pressed a button on a remote and a cage came crashing down. Perry ninja rolled out of the way just in time. "Oh, so you're going to fight?" asked Doofenshmirtz. "I see. En garde!" He lunged for Perry, but Perry grabbed Doofenshmirtz's wrist and slammed him onto the Loveinator. A pink beam came out of its tip and fired off in a random direction. Doofenshmirtz let out a cry of shock. "Oh, it takes forever to charge that laser!"

Phineas had finally gotten an idea for the day's task. "Ferb, I know what we're gonna &mdash;" Just then, the laser beam arced over from Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated to Phineas, cutting off his speech. All Phineas could think inside his mind was Isabella... "Isabella," Phineas whispered. "That's what we'll do!" He had a sappy expression on his face. "Let's get to work, Ferb, c'mon!" Ferb sat there, dumbstruck, as Phineas created a large paper valentine with Isabella's face on it. It took him less than a montage to build it, and he was putting the finishing touches on when Isabella walked in. "Whatcha do &mdash; whoa!" Whoa was about what could sum up Phineas's valentine. It had multiple moving parts, mostly hearts, big fireworks displays, and 'ISABELLA' in big, pink, sparkling letters. Phineas's eyes lit up at the sight of Isabella. "Isabella!" he gasped, hearts practically coming out of his eyes. "What do you think?" "I &mdash; I &mdash; I think it's wonderful!" sighed Isabella, walking around the valentine to see every feature &mdash; and there were a lot. "Phineas, I &mdash; wow..." "I know!" gushed Phineas. "Out of nowhere I just thought of you, and it's Valentine's Day, so I figured I would do something for you, because I &mdash;" Phineas clapped his hands over his mouth. "I &mdash; um..." Isabella looked at him with concern. "Phineas, are you all right?" "Um &mdash; I'm fine &mdash; I need &mdash; uh &mdash; water," he replied, feeling his face turn a bright, fiery red. He dashed inside the house, leaving Isabella outside, confused.

"Got any threes?" Perry shook his head. Doofenshmirtz sighed. "Ugh, I have to go fish again?" This was how Perry and Doofenshmirtz were passing the time until the laser was one hundred percent charged: playing Go Fish. Perry was kicking Doofenshmirtz's butt, and Doof was getting more and more frustrated. Perry turned over a king and pointed at it. Doofenshmirtz got really mad then. "Take it, take it," he said, looking over at the Loveinator to see if it was fully charged. "Ninety-five percent!" he sighed. Turning around, he saw Perry's smug face. That really set off Doofenshmirtz. "Urgh!" he shouted. "Got any sevens?" Perry's eyes widened for a split second, then returned to normal. With a completely straight poker face, he passed the seven card over to Doofenshmirtz, who did a little dance. "Yes, finally!" he said. Perry turned around a jack and pointed at it. Doofenshmirtz looked down at his hand and saw to his shock that he had the three other jacks. "What the &mdash; how did I not notice that?" he cried, but Perry simply put out his hand and crooked his fingers in a give it to me kind of way. Doofenshmirtz reluctantly handed over the three jacks and got up to see the Loveinator's progress. "Don't look at my hand &mdash; oh look, one hundred percent!"

Phineas ran through the house to the bathroom. Splashing water on his face, he looked in the mirror. His face was regaining its normal color, but was still a bit red. He sighed and shook his head. "What's wrong with you, Phineas Flynn?" he asked himself. "Isabella's been just a friend... what's different today?" He was quiet for a moment. "Her silky black hair and pretty pink bow &mdash; snap out of it, Phineas!" he commanded himself. "You've been friends with Isabella forever, just friends, nothing more." Phineas looked in the mirror and sighed. "First sign of insanity, talking to yourself..." Outside, a million thoughts were running a marathon in Isabella's head. ''Phineas likes me? Since when? Wasn't it always just one-way? He never returned my feelings. What's happened to him? He's falling all over himself to impress me, and I am impressed, but what if we &mdash; Isabella physically gulped at the thought &mdash; date, and then we break up and never talk again? No, no, no. Why don't I want him as mi novio? What's wrong with me?''

Doofenshmirtz's hand was hovering over the fire button. "Get ready, Perry the Platypus!" he cackled. Perry snuck around the backside and flipped the reverse switch. Leaping up, he tackled Doofenshmirtz again and sent the Loveinator flying willy-nilly. It, predictably, shot over to the Flynn-Fletcher household &mdash; specifically, the bathroom. Getting hit by the laser again seemed, to Phineas, to smack some sense into him. Phineas ruffled his hair and went back outside. "Hey &mdash; Isabella," Phineas said in what he hoped came off as a calm, cool, and collected voice, but really, his heart was beating a drum solo. "Oh, hi, Phineas," Isabella replied, in the same manner as Phineas. Neither of them noticed Ferb in the background, embellishing on a piece of paper what looked like the initials E.K. They both started to talk at the same time. "I &mdash;" Isabella giggled. "You go first." Phineas sighed. "All right. I think that we &mdash;" He broke off. This was awkward. "Are too young to date?" Isabella said, then put on a macho-man voice. "Aren't you a bit young to be dating?" Phineas laughed. "Exactly. But, I think... I think we can have a crush. You know what I mean?" Isabella blushed. "Yep."

Back at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated, Perry was smashing the Loveinator repeatedly with the big mechanical hand. Finally, the machine was a fine powder. Doofenshmirtz flopped into it and sighed. "I know I'll never love again," he said, looking up at Perry, flying into the distance with his jetpack. "Curse you, Perry the Platypus!" Perry flew back to his owners' house and discarded his hat and jetpack. Walking nonchalantly into the backyard, he chittered. Or growled. Whichever you prefer. Phineas looked up at the sound. "Oh, there you are, Perry!" he said, then rumpled Perry's fur. "I bet Perry didn't have as crazy a day as we did, huh?" Perry shook his fur out and chittered again.

LATER THAT NIGHT...

Ferb was still awake, even though Phineas was fast asleep. Getting up quietly and making sure not to disturb any of his siblings or parents (his stepsister Candace was a very light sleeper), he crept downstairs and out the door, out to

the mailbox. He produced an envelope from his yellow feety pajamas and put it into the mailbox. But what was in the letter, and who was it to? The answer was simple: Emily Kinney. The letter didn't contain much &mdash; Ferb didn't really talk too much, even when he was writing &mdash; but it did include the E.K. he was decorating today. He was sending it to her in the hopes that she would realize that he really hadn't forgotten her. And he hadn't.