Lover of. . .

Ch. 1 Buford: Resister of the Resistance, and the Lover of Nachos
When one asked him for his name, he replied “I’m Buford: Resister of the Resistance”. This was actually the shortened form of his full original title, which was “Buford: Resister of the Resistance, and the Lover of Nachos”. Since Doofenshmirtz had been taken down a few weeks ago, there was no need for the name; but Buford had kept it, for old time’s sake.

Buford thought back to that “old time”. It still continued to amaze him to know that there had been other resistance groups in Danville then, not just Candace and her crew. But what really made Buford steam was the fact that there had been reliable, skillful, potentially useful people who, instead of joining the resistance groups, had stayed in hiding. Buford himself had quit the Resistance, but that was for several good reasons. Firstly, he got so good at it that not even Candace could teach him anything that he didn’t already know. Secondly, Buford didn’t like anyone telling him what to do all the time. And thirdly (this was worst of all), the Resistance didn’t have any nachos at their slumber parties, meetings, ect. But there was something, someone, actually, that made Buford wish that he could have joined the Resistance again without looking like a softy.

This someone, as you have probably guessed, was her. Jessica Grace Fletcher, the prettiest girl in all the dimensions. In the midst of a battle, her vivid green hair was a beacon the Buford; her blue eyes, no matter how piercing, left him groping for words. Buford sighed dreamily as his thoughts turned from the Resistance to Jessie, as she preferred to be called. She had been through a lot. Abandoned by all, even her mother, crashing to Earth, realizing that she had a twin brother (one of the coolest around), Doof’s reign, having Candace as a sister, having a once-evil cyborg platypus as a pet. She had lived through it all, and was still living through it. And that was something that Buford admired in her, among everything else about her. As Buford sat there, daydreaming, he had no idea that someone was coming up from behind him. That is, until she spoke.

“What are you doing?”

Buford whirled ‘round.

Ch. 2 NOTHING!
Buford came face-to-face with a girl that had been in hiding during Doof’s evil reign because she couldn’t bear the thought of opposing her own relations, no matter how evil. Her name was Kayla. Kayla Doofenshmirtz. She had tealish hair (somewhat poofy) that fell down just below her shoulders. Her outfit consisted of a shirt with the left sleeve torn so that there was hardly sleeve to talk about. Her pants had a similar design, except that it was the right pant leg that was shorter. A leather band ran around Kayla’s waist, with a metal frying pan hanging from it. A small “s” in a circle (the symbol of Kayla’s home planet, Stellafrania) was on her shirt, and a pair of large black boots completed the outfit. Kayla also had a pet platypus named Ivy, who wasn’t there at the moment. Kayla looked at Buford impatiently, waiting for Buford to answer her question.

“Did you hear me?” She asked.

“Yep,” Buford replied.

. ..

“Well. . .?”

“I was just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? You were thinking about. . .nothing.”

“That’s right. You gotta problem with that?”

“Maybe. I mean, why would you waste your time thinking about nothing when you could be doing other useful things? You’re just not telling me what you’re thinking because it would embarrass you, right?”

“NO!” Buford exploded. “I’m thinking about nothing! Nothing at all!”

“''Sure you are. . .''” Kayla gave Buford a look before turning on her heel and walking away. Buford sighed for the second time that day. That had been close. Buford hated it when girls were right, and unfortunately for him, Kayla was 100% correct about embarrassing thoughts. Buford just wasn’t sure if he could live with everyone knowing about his love for a girl. He was the toughest of the tough, and being in love with someone. . . .well, Buford wasn’t sure if he could survive with everyone knowing this and possibly mocking him for it.

Ch. 3 A Little Problem
“Hey Candace!” Phineas was standing on his head on one of the topmost branches of the tree in their backyard. “Look at me! No hands!” Candace stepped out of the house, and gasped when she saw her younger brother in a dangerous-looking situation.

“PHINEAS FLYNN!” the orange-haired teenage girl nearly screamed. “JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING UP THERE?!?!?”

“Just practicing for Ferb’s, Jessie’s and my Cirque.” Phineas swung down to the ground. “Ta-da!” Candace moaned.

“Alright,” she said, “just be careful, for heaven’s sake.” Candace looked around the backyard. She saw Ferb working on the seats for the Circus. . .Cirque. . .whatever. “Platyborg!” She called. Perry came out of the house.

“Yes?” he asked. Shortly after Platyborg had come back to live with Phineas and Ferb, they had made him a translator that he could turn on and off when he wished.

“Stay out here and make sure that these two stay safe. I’m going to be at the HQ if you need me.” Candace walked around the side of the house.

“Will do,” Perry replied. He stretched and lay down on the grass. He scanned the backyard. “Where’s Jessie?” He asked. Phineas shrugged.

“Hey, Ferb!” the red-headed boy called. “Where’s our sister?” Ferb paused and closed his eyes. He appeared to be concentrating very hard.

Jessie? Ferb was calling to his twin sister in his mind. He waited, then tried again. ''Jessica? ''

You know that I like being called Jessie. A voice replied, in Ferb’s mind. It was a girl’s voice, the voice of Jessie.

We just wanted to know where you were. Ferb telepathated.

''OK. I’m at the HQ. ''

''Doing what? ''

''Polishing up on my fighting. ''

''Well, we’re working on a Cirque here. Wanna come over and help? ''

''Sure, I’m almost done here. ''

''OK. See ya. ''

''Bye. ''

Ferb turned to his brother and pet. “She’s at the HQ,” he explained. “She’ll be over soon.” Phineas went over to Ferb, and helped him build. Platyborg heard a loud commotion coming from down the street. He got up, peered over the gate that surrounded the backyard. Platyborg’s expression changed; he turned and ran to Phineas and Ferb.

“Come on.” Phineas and Ferb looked at the cyborg, confused. Phineas got on top of all the seats, and what Platyborg had seen Phineas also saw. The two boys and Perry ran to the house. Phineas disappeared inside the house, and came back holding two pistols.

“Super Concentrated Water Guns,” Phineas said. Ferb had closed his eyes, and switched to telepathy mindset. ''Jessica. ''

''I told you not to use that na. . . ''

''That doesn’t matter right now. There are Normbots coming up the street towards our house. I believe they must be left over from Doof’s reign. I’d say that there are about 50 of ‘em. ''

''Really? Where do they keep coming from?''

''I don’t know. But get the other members rounded up. Platyborg, Phineas, and I will be there shortly. ''

''How are you going to get here? ''

''We have weapons, and we’re not afraid to use them. ''

''Alright. See you here, then. ''

''Yep. Ferb’s out. ''

“Ready?” Phineas asked. Perry and Ferb nodded. Phineas took a deep breath, but it was Ferb who spoke.

“Let’s do this.”

Ch. 4 Almost
Buford had been at Doofenshmirtz’s house, the only place that Buford knew of that would, without a doubt, have nachos. Buford had gotten an extra-large helping of the crunchy, cheesy goodness, and he was going to do something that he ordinarily wouldn’t dream of. Buford was going to share his snack with someone. And not just with anyone, but with Jessie. He had decided that, if he was going to love Jessica, then he might as well not be all cowardly about it.

He walked into the HQ, and saw the girl of his dreams. She must’ve been training, because she was breathing heavily and perspiring. Right now, though, Jessie’s eyes were closed, and Buford knew that was speaking to Ferb via telepathy. Buford wished that he had telepathy; then he could tell Jessie about his feelings for her and no one else would be able to listen in on them. Jessie’s head snapped up, and Buford hid the nachos behind his back.

“Come on,” Jessie told him.

“What for?” Buford asked.

“There’s a group of Normbots coming up the street that Candace lives on,” Jessie explained. We have to get the other Resistance members rounded up.” She walked past Buford, who kept the nachos hidden. Normally, Buford would have been excited and eager to partake in a battle, but now he was despondent. He had almost made his feelings known once and for all to Jessica. Almost. As Buford followed Jessie out of the room, he knew that “almost” wouldn’t cut it.

Ch. 5 May I Have Your Attention, Please?
The Resistance members were seated at a large table in the main room of the HQ. Candace was the only one standing, and she was explaining the plan to the others. Phineas, Ferb, and Platyborg had made it safely across the street, but not without having to blast a few Normbots, which stirred them up. Buford was fine with that.

“The angrier, the better.” he stated.

“Alright,” Candace said. “Here’s what we’ll do. Jeremy and Coltrane, you go out first. You’re going to distract the Rust-Buckets while everyone else gets into position. Our goal here is to surround them, and cut off all escape. Isabella, you and the Firestorm girls will. . .”

Buford was really trying hard to concentrate, but that was hard, considering that Jessie was sitting right across from him.

“. . .And Buford and Dr. Baljeet, you will support Jeremy and Coltrane. Got it?” Candace didn’t wait for an answer to the question. She clapped her hands. “Let’s suit up, people!” They all got up and started out. Buford walked over to Dr. Baljeet.

“Uh, what are we doing, again?” Buford questioned, embarrassed. Baljeet sighed. He knew all about Buford and Jessie, and although it was sometimes comical, it could also be quite time-consuming.

“I’ll tell you on the way.” Dr. Baljeet replied. They followed the others to the entrance. This was gonna be good.

Ch. 6 The Skirmish
Jeremy and Coltrane went out of the HQ first. The stood a moment, becoming adjusted to the light. Then they started forward, slowly, casually. The Normbots were hovering around, taking in their surroundings, saying things like

“Present your papers, or be destroyed.”

“Do you want a muffin?”

“Muffins are delicious.”

They hadn’t done any real harm, yet. The two teenage boys came closer, their hands going into their pockets, coming back out with small pistols, easy to conceal because of their size. Jeremy cast a sidelong glance at Coltrane, who nodded slightly. The two of them ran forward suddenly, screaming their heads off. This caught the Normbots’ attention, and they turned and began to blast at the two Resisters, who dogged them with ease.

“OK!” Candace shouted. (Another “OK” is heard faintly, like an echo.) “Buford and Baljeet, you follow them. Isabella, you know where you’re going. Phineas, Ferb, Jessie, Platyborg, follow me! Kayla, don’t hit the Resistance members. Ivy, stay with Kayla! Remember the plan!”

Dr. Baljeet and Buford raced after Jeremy and Coltrane. Dr. Baljeet took a complicated-looking device from one of his super-sized pockets, and shot one of the Normbots with it. Nothing seemed to happen. Buford looked at Baljeet, who sighed.

“This ray interferes with the robots weapon mechanisms,” the Indian boy explained hurriedly. “The ray works for about 15 seconds. You have that long to disable the robot while it is defenseless.”

“Oh,” Buford replied, before jumping onto the Normbot and yanking a metal plate off of its back. It didn’t take long for Buford to find and disable the main wiring. The Normbot fell with a crash, and Buford took a moment to examine the battle from his vantage point.

Dr. Baljeet was blasting every Normbot in sight, and others rushed to destroy them before their weapons started working again. Jeremy and Coltrane were also shooting down the robots, giving each other high-fives throughout the process. Candace was whacking the “Rust Buckets” with her metal rod, and running them through with her Can-gadgets. Phineas and Ferb were having a lot of fun with their “water fight”, but they were also serious, as if they understood how serious a battle, even a small one, can be. Perry had taken to the skies, and he would swoop down intermittently, blasting Normbot heads with his guns or slamming them with his double mace. Kayla was hitting Normbots left and right with her frying pan, and her pet Ivy (who had been trained to think and act like a human by her owner) was helping a great deal. Isabella and the Firestorm girls had spread out, and when it seemed that a Normbot might escape, they tangled it in their jump-ropes, then pulled back, sending the Normbot spinning into a bunch of other robots. Jessie was everywhere. Jumping, hitting, kicking, grabbing up discarded pieces of metal and using them as effective weapons.

As Buford gazed, he was filled with the joy, the lifting of the spirit that he always encountered when he saw a battle being fought, especially if his side was the one winning. Buford, I’m sad to say, wasn’t checking out what was behind him, and he was plucked off of the metal heap he had been on, and found himself face-to-face with another Normbot. This one had not been shot by Baljeet’s laser thingy.

“I use oppression to hide my insecurity,” the Normbot said, pointing his laser hand right at Buford’s face. Buford closed his eyes, waited for the bullet strike. But it didn’t come, because the Normbot’s attention was diverted at the last second.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Something, someone came flying out of nowhere, landing on top of the Normbot’s head.

An angel? Buford thought. No, he saw the green hair. It wasn’t an angel. It was better than an angel. It was Jessie. Jessie seemed on fire. She completely demolished the Normbot, and continued to do so, even after it had shut down. Jessie finally turned from the scrap heap (that had once been a robot), and helped Buford to his feet.

“Next time,” she said, her eyes still gleaming, “Make sure you look behind you, as well as ahead.” Buford continued to stand there, and Jessie left to take care of the diminishing number of Normbots. Buford gulped, then sighed for the third time that day.

She talked to me, he thought happily.

Ch. 7 I've Got Something to Tell You
The skirmish was over. Many of the Resistance members, if not all of them, seemed sad to see it end. Jeremy and Candace were talking to each other, something that they seemed to be doing a lot more lately. Coltrane was polishing his gun. Isabella was congratulating the Firestorm girls for a job well done, and they were also untangling their jump ropes. Kayla was talking to Ivy via telepathy, and they seemed to be arguing about who had destroyed the largest number of Normbots. Phineas and Ferb were chatting about new and more effective weapons, and Platyborg was sitting in between the two boys, smiling fondly and proudly at them. Buford sat down on the curbing by the road, took out the nachos (yes, he had them with him this entire time; don’t ask me where), and bit into one thoughtfully. He was unaware that someone was sitting next to him until she spoke.

“That was a good fight,” Jessica commented. Buford straightened, a little startled, then nodded. He ate another nacho.

“I hope we can do that again sometime, with the exception of you almost getting killed out there.” Buford nodded again, and looked around him. He looked at all the Resistance members standing around him, at Dr. Baljeet, who was staring intently back.

Go on. Baljeet’s eyes said. Do it.

Buford gazed about him once more. He looked down at his nachos, then at Jessie out of the corner of his eye. Suddenly, it didn’t matter to Buford who saw him or who didn’t see him. He didn’t care about what people would say or think. All that mattered to him, right now, and forever, was Jessie; this girl sitting next to him. This was the moment, and Buford decided to do some serious Carpe Diem. He held out his nachos to Jessie with a hand that shook a little. Buford gulped, then spoke, looking right into her eyes.

“I saved you some nachos,” he said, hoping it didn’t sound lame. Jessie examined the nachos for a long moment, and Buford was afraid that she would refuse. Then, Jessie’s face relaxed. She smiled at Buford, and took a gooey handful of the crunchy, cheesy goodness. Buford was smiling as if he had just won the lottery. He hoped desperately that this would continue, not disappear with the nachos. Buford looked again at Jessie, who was grinning at him. Buford smiled back, and he felt whole.

Epilogue
If you were ever to go to the 2nd Dimension, and meet up with Buford, he would probably be holding an extra-large helping of nachos. Ask him his name, and he will tell you “I’m Buford: Resister of the Resistance.” But then, ask him for his full name. Chances are, if you bother him enough, he will tell you. A pause, perhaps, a look of uncertainty, but then a smile will spread slowly over his face, and he will say (with head held high and pride in his voice),

“I’m Buford: Resister of the Resistance, the Liker of Nachos, and the Lover of the Prettiest Girl in all the Dimensions.”

Continuation

 * Words in italics stand for someone's thoughts, with the exception of Ch. 2, when Kayla's being all sarcastic.


 * Kayla using a frying pan as a weapon is a refrence to Tangled, and to the one scene in The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings, when Samwise Gamgee attacks the orks in the Mines of Moria with a frying pan.


 * The title of Ch. 7 is a refrence to a song in Meet the Robinsons.


 * There are refrences to ATSD scenes and lines.


 * The "OK!" echo in Ch. 6 is a refrence to The Lake Nose Monster.


 * In the final chapter, when Buford shares his nachos with Jessie, is a refrence to a picture done by Fossy. This story is based off of that ame picture.


 * In Ch. 6, the line "Muffins are delicious", is taken from Phineas and Ferb: Across the Dimension of Doooom! the computer game.

This story belongs to PlatyborgstoShadowlytes. Ask her permission first before doing anything to it. Thank you.