User blog comment:PlantyThePottedPlant/Random Topic Blogging III: Blog Harder/@comment-1647442-20141003003256/@comment-3473686-20141006194957

Okay, I've had it. I've just had it.

I'm a Christian, but I'm honestly very embarrassed to even call myself one, and it's because of people who call themselves that but then act very un-Christlike: Spreading lies about gay people, generalizing groups they disagree with, talking about those people like they're inferior and stupid...I'm pretty sure that's NOT how Jesus would act. He hung out with the outcasts of society; the least we can do is treat them like equal human beings--because that's what they are. People. Just like us.

I guess the reason why I've kept my mouth shut around Tib for so long is because I fear that cutting ties with him would also mean never speaking to Fossy again--because, you know, they're dating. Fossy still means the world to me, but I suppose risking the loss of a friendship is better than staying with a "friend" that makes me feel ashamed of even existing. Oh, how dare I disagree with some of the more traditional teachings; How dare I not attend your so-called "reform therapy" places (which, by the way, DON'T WORK). You know, there are much bigger problems in this world then who gets married to who.

And besides, those verses that you use to condemn gay people? They've been taken out of their historical context. Not to mention that it's been translated from a very old language, and probably isn't entirely accurate. But I guess most people are just too lazy to actually study the scriptures and would rather just take it at face value and stick with the literal interpretation. Oh yeah, and don't trust anything Focus on the Family says. Did you know that they twist or even flat-out lie about statistics and such to make them appear to say things they actually don't? They lie about pretty much everything these days, actually. And yet, many people seem to just blindly listen to everything they say.

Again, I'm probably risking never talking to Fossy again--and that devastates me--but I can't do this anymore. Tib, you've become a lot like my grandparents. Yes, I went there, I fricking went there. And the last thing I need is people like that stressing me out again. I'm sick and tired of your self-righteous "I'm smarter than you" attitude. Being a follower of Jesus doesn't make you better than anyone else. And me being both Christian and LGBT doesn't make me inferior to you, so stop acting like that. You may not remember, but I still have an email from you where you said you didn't think I was going to Hell, but then you immediately turned around and told to go see a "therapist" to "reform" myself. I've been angry with you since then, and it's obvious that you'll never understand how hypocritical that was--or how hurtful it was.

What happened? You guys used to be there for me. You used to be so supportive of me. And because I trusted you, I poured out my heart to you and admitted my deepest secret. But once I was outed, you guys flipped your lids. I hadn't changed, but obviously you began to think of me differently. You were the friends I trusted the most, and you betrayed that trust. You ripped my heart out and stomped on it. I haven't felt like I could trust anyone since then. Because if some of my closest friends in the world could break my heart like that, how can I know that others won't do the same?

It does break my heart to have to say these things. It really does. We used to have so much fun together, talking on Google Hangouts and watching Nostalgia Critic and YTPs together...those were great times. But I don't think I'll ever feel welcome in our inner circle anymore. Part of me is sorry--not for being someone you don't approve of, but for ever being honest with you. And yet, I'm also sorry for being dishonest about how I was feeling. But I practically wear my heart on my sleeve now, and it's time you knew how angry and hurt I am because of you.

I do hope that maybe God will someday open your eyes. But I guess whatever happens is up to Him. All I know is that He doesn't want me to stay in such an unhealthy relationship.

I've given you a lot of second chances already, Tib, and you blew each one of them. Maybe someday I'll be able to forgive you, but it will probably take a very long time.