Albert's Shaky Comment



Author's Note: I'm writing a lot of P&F one shots recently. Don't know why. Anyway, this one came up, after I heard about the Japan Earthquake, and imagined Stacy's reaction to it. I think she'd be pretty upset. Then I imagined she needed some comforting. Then this idea came up. Ok, unlike my last one, this IS part of Iaf Coutnity, so go Read The Adventures of Irving and Friends, or you won't get any of it Any comedic shots taken at this event are purely satirically, and I mean no disrespect to the Japanese people. Let's pray for them. As usaul, I don't own P&F.

Albert's Shaky Comment

By Spongey444

/

It was a bright and sunny morning in Danvile. Albert was already awake, and ready to go. He walked by Irving, who was eating breakfast, on the way out.

Albert: Good morning, oh brother of mine.

Irving: ...Who are you and what have you done with Albert?

Albert: Why do you always say that whenever I'm happy?

Irving: I don't know, they say it on TV all the time.

Albert: Whatever. Anyway, I'm going to Stacy's house.

Irving: Of course. You know, you've been much happier since you hooked up with her.

Albert: Well, love can make even the meanest of people happy.

Irving: Well, it worked for Doof. Plus, you've been less mean to me recently.

Albert: I'd try to fix that, but I'm so happy, I'll let you go,. Just this once.

Irving: Awesome!

Albert: Well now I gotta go.

Irving: Wait Albert!

Albert: What?

Irving: I've built something you need!

Albert: What is it?

Irving: Behold...the Teleport-Watch atron!

Albert: Let me guess, you have one too, and you want to use to teleport me to you when you need help.

Irving: Am I really that predictable?

Albert: Yes. Yes you are. Well, I'll wear, but you better not want me while I'm gone.

Irving: I can't promise that. Well, I've got things of my own to do today.

Albert: You're gonna join Perry on his mission?

Irving: ...How do you do it?

Albert: ...I have no idea. Well bye!

Albert then left for Stacy's house.

Irving: Well, just gotta wait for the signal.

Phineas (Off Screen): Hey, Where's perry?

Irving: That's my cue!

Irving then threw on an agent hat and ran off screen to head to perry's hideout.

/

Perry and Irving dropped in at almost the same time.

Monogram: Good Morning agent P, and & I.

Irving: So what's going today, Major M? Even evil deeds going on that we must stop, in the name of justice?

Monogram: And this is why he have agents that don't talk. Anyway, Dr Doofenshmirtz...actually did his plan last night. We totally forgot to spy on him. We have no idea what he did. So I want you find out what he WAS up, and find out why we didn't...put a stop to it, I guess.

Irving: Will do!

They left to fight Doof

/

Albert had arrived at Stacy's house. He knocked on the door and Stacy's mother stepped out, and Albert noticed she was tearing up.

Albert: Hey Mrs Hirano. Is Stacy in?

Mrs Hirano: Oh, Hello Albert. She's right inside.

Albert: Great

Al stepped inside, and saw Stacy sitting on the couch, and just her mother, she was tearing up a bit.

Albert (Thinking): Should I ask what;s wrong? No, I don't wanna seem nosing ,better just keep quiet.

Stacy: Oh hey Al.

Albert: Hey. What's going on?

Stacy: Nothing much.

Albert: Well, I guess I'll watch some Tv. I could do this at my home, but I like doing things I always do, in other places.

Albert turned on the Tv.

Albert: Oh hey, this is that one Monster movie where that monster attacks Japan!

Stacy: Huh?

Albert: I love this movie. The scenes with the monster stomping through Japan and crushing those people is great!

Mrs Hirano: Surly you must be kidding.

Albert: I'm not, and don't call me Shirley. Anyway, let's see what else is. Oh,, it's some documentary on the whole Hiroshima bombing. Interesting!

Stacy: *Gasp*

Mrs Hirano: Albert, you probably shouldn't be watching that.

Albert: Why? It's really interesting. Maybe I should go back to that movie. So awesome. Though it's odd all monster movies take place in Japan. Is it the center of the world or something? Or maybe Japanese people did something to deserve it.

Stacy: How could you say something like that?

Albert: What? The Japanese people deserving it thing?

Stacy: Don't say it again!

Albert: I don't get it, why so sensitive?

Stacy: Why so UNsensitive?

Stacy then ran upstairs, crying.

Albert: ...What's her problem? ...I wonder what Irving's up to.

./

Jingle Singers: Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!

Irving and Perry burst into DEI

Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Perry the platypus ...and Irving the human boy? ...Eh ok. I need someone to actually talk to for a change!

Irving: Ok Doof, hurry up and show me your plan that you already pulled off, so we can go.

Doofenshmirtz: Normally, I'd be mad but I too have better things to do, so let's start! Ok you already know about my brother roger, correct?

Irving: Ya, he's a bit of a jerk.

Doofenshmirtz: I know Right? Anyway I learned something about him the other. A long time ago, before he was born, My Mother went on a trip to japan, without me of course, and she met a guy and...

Irving: And what?

Doofenshmirtz: I'll tell you when your older. Anyway, one thing lead to another and Roger was born. Yes, Roger was born from my mom meeting some other guy, Dad I didn't know this til the other day, I'll leave out what happened next, cuz it's not pretty. Anyway, so Japan is single handily responsible for my terrible life!

Irving: You're attacking an entire nation...because of one guy? I know you're revenge schemes are petty, but this is just stupid. What's next, new Mexico, the wolfman, dentists, the animal shelter, Baseball?

Doofenshmirtz: ..Ignoring that. Anyway, I decided that Japan needed a little shaking up.

Irving: Shaking up? I heard on the news about some earthquake...could it be?

/'

Albert: What could of possibly gotten into her? Eh, might as well watch the news, see what's going on.

News Reporter: This just in. An earthquake has hit japan!

Albert: ...What?

News Reporter: I'd say more but...I'm not really a news reporter. I just found this suit and put it on. Well...a bunch of people died. Sad really. I sure feel sorry for the any guy who has cheesed off a Japanese person without knowing it.

Albert: ...Oh snap! That's why Stacy was all sensitive She must be depressed about that earthquake! I feel like such a idiot! I should go apologize...

But before he could do anything, a portal suddenly emerged...from his watch.

Albert: Oh come on! I told Irving-oh, I might as well see what he's up.

Al peeked into the portal to see Irving and Doof.

Doofenshmirtz: So, Dr Heinz Doofenshmirtz, have made...the Earthquake-inator!

Irving: Wait...so YOU caused that earthquake?

Doofenshmirtz: Yep! I don't know how big it was, but I hoped it was small, like I wanted.

Irving: Last time I checked, it was a 9.0

Doofenshmirtz: ...Oh snap. Eh, whatever.

Irving: Doof, did this is the worst thing you've ever done! I know your evil...but this is terrible!

Doofenshmirtz: I know what I did was bad, but eh America's too busy talking about that one singer with the stupid hair to be worrying about an earthquake.

Irving: And That's terrible. I still can't believe you caused that earthquake!

Albert: He WHAT?

Doofenshmirtz: What? Oh I didn't cause that earthquake, it's bulldonkey it's not true, it is NOT...Ohai Albert.

Albert: YOU did this! You caused that quake, you hurt thousands of people! And you made my girlfriend and her family sad! ...In retrospect that last part isn't that bad

Doofenshmirtz: You? Girlfriend? That's a laugh! Even if you do have one, she must be really stupid if she's dating you!

Albert: What did you say about my girlfriend?

Irving: Oh your gonna get it now.

Albert: That's it, you've hurt thousands people, as well as my girlfriends feelings, but insulting her is just not acceptable.

Doofenshmirtz: Whatever!

Albert: Oh that's it!

Albert then proceeded to conjure up never seen strength, and picked up Doof and threw him across the room.

Irving: Holy crud!

Albert: There's more where that came from! So never cross me again!

Doofenshmirtz: ...I hate my life.

Albert: Ok let's go back through to the portal.

Stacy: Albert?

Albert: Stacy? How did-wait you saw that through the portal, didn't you?

Stacy: Yes. Yes I did. I only saw a bit of it though, no idea who that german guy was. Come back over here.

They stepped through portal, which closed after them.

Albert: Look stacy I-

Stacy: Before you say anything, ...that awesome! ...And sweet.

Albert: Look, I'm sorry I was insensitive, I had no idea.

Stacy: It's ok, it's just that, that quake hit a little close to home, literally None of my relatives were hurt or anything, but they aren't in the best condition, and my family is sorta depressed right now.

Albert: That's horrible. ...Does someone need a hug?

Stacy: ...Yes. Yes I do.

Albert: *Hugs Stacy*

Irving and Mrs Hirano: Awwwww!

Albert: ...Could you get out of here?

THE END